Ben Milstead

Listening, Learning, Sharing

Thank God for Tic Tacs

A few weeks ago I stopped by the grocery store before picking the boys up from school.  The kids love orange Tic Tacs so I grabbed a couple of packs.  I went on to the school to get them and we started our normal conversation.  ”How was your day? - Fine.  What did you learn today? - Nothing.  Did you get in trouble? - I don’t think so.”  I gave them both the small gift expecting praises to Daddy and excitement, etc.  NOTHING!  Not even a glance.  Not a pause in their conversation.  Not even a little ole ”thank you”.  So I calmly pulled the car over, got out, opened the back door, and made both of them hand over the Tic Tac’s.   I closed the door and walked back around to the driver’s side.  As I got in the car I was greeted with “Thank you….thank you Daddy…..can we have them back?”

My kids will never see those Tic Tacs again because I felt like I needed to make a point they wouldn’t forget.  All I wanted was a simple thank you or even an acknowledgment that I had given them a gift.

Last week  I read 1 Chronicles 16:8: Give thanks to the Lord, call on his name; make known among the nations what He has done.  I was reminded of the point I had made with my kids the week before.  What if God did to us what I did to my kids when we don’t say thank you?  I give thanks for the big gifts but what about the everyday gifts that He gives us?  It hurt when my kids didn’t acknowledge my gift even though it was something small.  I can only imagine how God feels when we take so many things for granted.

 

May 5, 2008 Posted by benmilstead | Lessons Learned | | No Comments

Odd’s and End’s

Two days in blog world and I made history with this Tony Morgan  post.  Bloggy McBloggerson (T Morgan) really jumpstarted the blog world in this area and always comes with great stuff.  I was honored to be mentioned on his site.  I wish the 5000th comment would have been something with a little more thought than a Fannie Crosby reference but I’ll take what I can get.  Wonder what I win?

I started listening to Lou Holtz’ new book “Wins, Losses, and Lessons” this morning.  So far so good.  The material is good but Lou is narrating the audio book himself.  That is good for a laugh or two.

 Finally, I watched this yesterday.  I’m not sure how I stumbled across a 9/11 video but I’m glad I did.  We should all watch this coverage from time to time so that we don’t forget.  Chilling….

May 2, 2008 Posted by benmilstead | Randomness | | No Comments

Wish You Were Here

A few years ago Mahalie and I were invited to go to Colorado with some friends.  It was going to be an all expense paid trip once we got there, we just had to pay for a plane ticket.  But we had two kids at the time and a busy life.  I was unsure of the travel plans and our itenerary so we opted to stay home. One day I got this postcard in the mail from the same friends.  It was a picture of a huge ski slope covered in fresh powder.  A nice little cabin was over to one side with smoke coming out of the chimney.  It was more inviting than I could have ever imagined.  Across the top of the postcard it said “Wish You Were Here!”  To think that I could have been right there!!  Dang. 

What if you went to your mailbox one day and there was a postcard from God.  “Wish you were here” across the top of it with a picture and description of where you could have been in life if only you would have gone where He wanted you to go.    I wonder what opportunities we have blown because we decided not to follow His direction.  I wonder what that kind of happiness would have felt like.  I wonder what the note on the back would say.  I’ve never seen a postcard from an unhappy place, have you? 

Although we have all missed opportunities in the past, rest assured there will be more.  It’s not too late to find out what HE has in store for your life.  He invites us everyday.  Be ready.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”  Jer 29:11

May 2, 2008 Posted by benmilstead | Lessons Learned | | No Comments

Why would I take the time to Blog?

Several months ago I was driving to Charlotte by myself.  It’s about a two hour drive from where I live.  I arrived at my destination,  got out of the car, and started hearing some sort of alarm faintly in the distance.  It was another couple of minutes before I realized it was the alarm on my watch…the alarm I had set to notify me that I needed to be leaving home and on my way to Charlotte.  The alarm that had been going off for over two hours.  I never heard it!

I firmly believe that God is constantly talking to us but we have to be willing to listen!  So many times I’ve found myself saying “I just want to know God’s will” or “I just don’t hear Him saying anything”.  Well are you listening?  To God?  Maybe we don’t hear Him because our life is too loud.  We wake up to a radio.  I have a radio in the bathroom when I’m getting ready in the mornings.  Radio and kids are on in the car on the drive to school and to work.  You walk in the office and there are co-workers and music.  Many of us even fall asleep with the TV on!  So when do we allow time to hear God?  Our 10 minute quiet time in the mornings isn’t enough for some.  Turn life off for a second.  You would be amazed at what you hear.

In my homegroup a few weeks ago we got on the conversation about how some of us wake up in the middle of the night and our mind starts wondering and we can’t get back to sleep.  When that happens to me I end up turning the TV on.  Why?  Because I don’t want to hear the things going on in my mind.  Maybe that’s God trying to communicate with us.  If that’s the only time we give Him then that’s the time he’s going to take.  Psalm 46:10 “Be Still and know that I am God” can be translated several different ways.  One of the most obvious for me is to, are you ready for this?  BE STILL and KNOW that I AM GOD!!  Be quiet and listen!   The alarm on my watch was there the whole time.  It tried to talk to me for over two hours.  Just because I didn’t hear it doesn’t mean it wasn’t happening.  I wonder how many times that’s happened between me and God?

 So why would I blog?  I’m Blogging for….ME!   It’s one of my ways that I can “Be Still”.   I find it easier to remember things if I write them down and to formulate the thoughts in my head.   I must admit that, up until about six months ago, I thought this was the dumbest thing on the net.  That was until I started reading several blogs on a daily basis.  I have learned from others, been inspired by others, and have expanded my mind beyond the limits I had once set for myself. 

May 1, 2008 Posted by benmilstead | Lessons Learned | | 3 Comments

Get in the Game!

When I was in fourth grade I started playing basketball. My coach was a member of our church and a friend of our family. Coach Eddie had been around me enough to know that I knew the game of basketball. I could talk stats, strategies, etc., better than anyone my age and as good as many adults. I don’t remember the circumstances but I wasn’t at any of the practices leading up to that first season of round ball and even showed up late to the first game. We were coming back from vacation if memory serves. I will never forget walking into that gym for the first time. I had my uniform on, my new high-tops laced up tight, and I was ready to ball. I barely had time to sit down on the bench when the coach motioned for me. Within seconds of entering the gym I was standing 20 feet from our basket jockeying for position. The ball was passed to me; I began dribbling and then started my fast break. All of a sudden the whistle blew for no reason! “What do you mean backcourt” I thought. The kid that knew every player and stat of the 1980 UNC Tarheels, that looked like a ball player, had started a fast break….the wrong way. I was demoted to the first quarter squad after that. The first quarter squad was the players not good enough to play the last three quarters. There were many Saturdays that I sat on the bench in the second half wishing I was in the game…wishing I had practiced….vowing that if I ever got in I would do everything I could to stay in.
Fast forward eight years. Football had become my sport and I was okay at it. It was my senior year and so far I had played wide receiver, tight end, punt returner, defensive end, defensive tackle, and nose guard. We went 1-10-1 that year, probably because we had to have wide receivers playing nose guard but that’s not important. About four games into the season our defensive line coach pulled me to the side and told me that I didn’t have to worry about playing time. He told me that if I needed a rest that I could pull myself out of the game and, gasp, put myself back into the game when I was ready! This is what I had strived for my entire athletic career…to control my own playing time!
There was one game where we were getting destroyed. I was playing defensive tackle and the guy across the line of scrimmage from me was BIG. Not big as in fat, big as in he could kill you with his bare hands big. He had already received a dozen or so scholarship offers and his reputation preceded him. I found myself on my back with all 310 pounds of him pancaked on top of my 210 pound body several times. I was tired of getting knocked down so it seemed like a good time to take a breather. I was standing on the sideline for several plays when the Head Coach starts coming towards me. “Dear Lord, please strike my coach with temporary blindness so that he doesn’t see me. Amen.” That prayer wasn’t answered. “Milstead! What are you waiting for? Get back in the game, NOW!” At that moment I realized that I had become a spectator rather than a player and I had become satisfied with that because the game was too tough.
How many times have you wanted to “get in the game” but something was holding you back? You looked the part, acted the part, even had other people believing you could fill the part but it wasn’t enough…you weren’t living the part. The bigger question is how many times have you thought “I’ve made it” only to become lazy and content. Do you stand on the sidelines watching the game, happy with where you are and hoping no one notices that you aren’t participating? You have all the talent in the world but it just seems easier to watch rather than to play. You are frustrated by your surroundings, by the outcome, by your life but you just stand there trying to blend in with the other people that are on the sidelines watching. It’s comfortable…it’s convenient….it’s familiar…it’s less work.
Maybe it’s your marriage. Maybe it’s your job. Maybe it’s your church. Maybe it’s your relationship with Christ. Raising my hand when I say “Been there, done that.”
It’s time to get back in the game, whatever that is for you. You have taken your break on the sidelines and maybe gotten a little lazy; a little content with the way things are. Get back in the game. It’s time to be a player in the health of your family. It’s time to love your kids unconditionally and be a participant in their lives. If you don’t, someone else will eventually take your place on the field! It’s time to get in the game at church and with Christ! Stop standing on the sidelines watching, quietly criticizing those that are playing….frustrated with the outcome but not willing to do anything about it. It’s time to stop squandering the opportunities God gives us, time to stop being a quitter when things get tough. What are you waiting for? You aren’t here to watch, you are here to play. GET IN THE GAME! GET IN THE GAME!

Hebrews 12: 1-2
1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. 2 We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.[a] Because of the joy[b] awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.

May 1, 2008 Posted by benmilstead | Lessons Learned | | No Comments

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